I've had a recurring dream for about 20 years, with a frequency of about twice a year - about my first ever crush at secondary school from when I was 12 years old. As the years have gone by both of us have aged in my dream at the appropriate rate for the time that had passed.
For the last 20 years, she had rejected me at one stage or another of a blossoming romance, never allowing me as much as a kiss or a confirmation of our affection - until last night.
In my latest dream we were finally in a relationship, a confirmed one, a sexual one, in which we finally did kiss and it was clear she loved me as much as I loved her. It was exhilarating, I was not happy to wake up.
It sounds from my description like I have an unhealthy obsession with this woman, I've not spoken to her since she was 16, I never think of her but I feel she represents something quite different to my psyche than a teenage crush, something about me, and not at all about her. I'm not exactly sure what the dream means but that I'd finally allow myself her after years of painful rejection in my dreams feels like a shift has taken place. I find myself endlessly intriguing, even when asleep.
