Itís precisely because you are strong and independent that youíve been able to take this step but yes itís definitely scary, weíve all been there!
Iím so sorry that your counsellor dismissed your feelings, Iím horrified that a trained professional would tell someone what they thought they were, thatís not what they are supposed to do at all. If you do consider counselling (not saying you need it btw) then you might want to consider one who specialises in coming out or is associated with an LGBT organisation.
Iíd definitely encourage you to get to know some other gay people and especially some other gay women. Hearing (or even just reading) other peopleís coming out stories is really helpful too, or it was to me. Some people like you (and like me!) come out before having any experience and others realise when they find themselves unexpectedly in a relationship. There is no right or wrong way and there is no pressure for you to tell everyone right away, change your world at the rate the feels right for you. I will say though that the freedom of not having to hide is amazing.
There are lots of coming out stories here:http://boards.gingerbeer.co.uk/index.php?topic=66086.0
But also in the Identity Matters section of section as well as dotted all over really!
Dating websites are one way to get to know other gay women (how I met my wife!) but if you want to just meet more as friends (I found this very helpful, I seemed to know lots of gay men but not gay women so much when I was coming out) then try social events and meet ups put on by various LGBT organisations and groups.
Stonewall has info on whatís on (social groups and support groups) in your area here:http://www.stonewall.org.uk/help-advice/whats-my-area
If in the Northwest the LGBT Foundation has info here:http://lgbt.foundation/lgbt-directory
Good luck and welcome to rest of your life!