I feel well placed to answer this having had more wives and girlfriends than was necessary. There was nothing wrong with the first one, she was excellent wife material and is indeed now someone else's wife, mores the pity! If you're struggling, maybe through too much choice or over thinking, can be a good idea to go right back to the start. I puzzled my way - way away - from the start looking for a bleeding heart and talking myself out of my desires to find a socially acceptable solution - that failed. Then I would flip flop between what I really wanted and what I thought i should want. So the truth is, wife material is likely what you always craved and what you dated before life got confusing, and for me, any bloke and any butch not lying to impress you; 'a maid in the living room, a cook in the kitchen and a whore in the bedroom". I'm a bit greedier than that still as I do love the cut and thrust of a good argument, dull to have things all my own way all the time.. Huffy women are ok if you can tickle them around, if not then don't bother.
There's got to be enough of your 'must have' boxes to find her and keep finding her attractive too - Would you want a wife with uninspiring tits? Even if she was lovely? Then you spend a year with a woman like that. Those years add up! Raise the bar high! Sex matters