Author Topic: The Vault Porn Writers' Guild  (Read 62449 times)

Offline enitharmon

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Re: The Vault Porn Writers' Guild
« Reply #375 on: Oct 11, 2013, 12:54:01 AM »
Smut, first draft.  Please let me know if you enjoy this story.
------
PART I

Helen looked at her watch.  She'd been happy enough to go with David, her husband, to the Chamber of Commerce dinner at the town hall.  It was an excuse to get dressed up, and she didn't get many of those these days, she thought.  She wondered now if it had been a good idea to choose the  burgundy satin dress, the one with the spaghetti straps, cut low across her soft mounds of her breasts and flowing down to mid-calf.  As she picked at her rubber chicken the man sitting opposite kept trying to refill her wine glass as a pretext for leering down her cleavage.  She had to bite back the urge to make a scene for David's sake.  She had to keep an eye on him, too.  If he got drunk he'd want to be amorous when they got home, and then he'd fall asleep on top of her again and snore like a train.  She'd have to gently prise him off her so she could go and sleep in Natalie's room.  It was a good job her daughter was away at university.

And then there was that woman in charge of the catering.  Lisa, her name was, according to the tag pinned to the jacket of her immaculately tailored navy suit.  Helen couldn't work out just what it was about Lisa that got to her.  Something, perhaps, in the way she moved so efficiently amongst the tables, flirting with the men right in front of their wives.  Perhaps it was just the chestnut hair cut into an artlessly stylish bob that put her own mousy waves to shame.  Perhaps it was the way her crisp white blouse outlined small, pert breasts with a hint of...

No, she wasn't going to run with that thought.  Now the meal was over she wanted to go home, but the business people, how annoying that they were nearly all men, were mingling talking business.  Helen look around the hall, at the dull and dusty portraits of long-gone dignitaries (all men), at the stained-glass depicting scenes of long-gone local industry.  The town hall fascinated her.  From outside it was a gothic fantasy, part cathedral, part fairy-tale castle all spires and arches and turrets.  From inside she could never work out how you got to those turrets.  There must be hidden  doors and staircases, she thought.  If only she could find them and escape.

"Would you like me to show you round?"  Helen started from her reverie to find Lisa beside her, smiling.  Her lipstick, Helen thought, was so immaculately applied it might have been sprayed on by the car body workshop.  But it was Lisa's eyes that really grabbed her attention, now that she saw them close to.  They were blue, the deep blue of a Mediterranean sky, and they seemed to look right into her innermost thoughts.  Helen felt the blood rush into her cheeks, burning red as coals.  She knew now how Lisa held all these men in thrall, how they would do her bidding.  And she, Helen, hated her.  What if David...

"It's so boring isn't it," Lisa was saying.  "I saw you  looking at the windows and I thought you wanted rescuing.  It's a really interesting building, you know, but we don't use much of it any more.  Would you like a look around?"

Helen wanted to say, no, she was tired.  But she knew that she would do what Lisa wanted whether she wished to or not.  And when Lisa turned and headed towards the door she knew she would follow her wherever she went.  Lisa led the way up a stone staircase, along a corridor lined with offices, through a door and up another staircase.  Helen lost all sense of direction.  The corridors were dim and without windows.  They went through another door and into darkness.  From somewhere Lisa produced a torch.  They were climbing again, up and round, up and round.  They came to another door.  Lisa had a key. She unlocked it and pushed the door open, inviting Helen to pass in front of her.
Helen stepped into a tiny, round room.  A tall, narrow window let in the last of the low summer sun, turning the stone walls to flame where the rays struck them.  Through the window, far below, Helen saw the people walking about in Market Street.

"It's one of the corner turrets!" she said.

"My special place," said Lisa.  "Like it?  I don't think anybody else knows about it these days."

"It's wonderful!" said Helen.  "It's just like escaping into an old romance!"

"I thought you'd like it," said Lisa.  "I've been watching you all evening.  You know, you're beautiful,  easily the most attractive person in that room."

Helen froze, still leaning on the windowledge looking out.  She felt the blood burning in her cheeks again.  It wasn't possible.  Was it?  It was all a dream.  She felt the softest of touches on the back of her neck.  It was like a sudden jolt of electricity, jagging down her spine.  It left her paralysed, helpless.

"And I love that dress," said Lisa.  "I'd just love to peel it off you!"

PART II follows

Offline enitharmon

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Re: The Vault Porn Writers' Guild
« Reply #376 on: Oct 11, 2013, 12:55:04 AM »
PART II

Helen felt something, the back of a manicured thumbnail, sliding slowly down the middle of her back, through the silk of her dress.  A thousand sparks fizzed through her body.   They all seemed to be heading for her cunt.  She knew her cunt was oozing with juice, soaking her knickers.  She leaned further forward over the window ledge, seeing the couples on the street below even as she thrust her buttocks backwards.  She began to moan softly.
Helen felt something, the back of a manicured thumbnail, sliding slowly down the middle of her back, through the silk of her dress.  A thousand sparks fizzed through her body.   They all seemed to be heading for her cunt.  She knew her cunt was oozing with juice, soaking her knickers.  She leaned further forward over the window ledge, seeing the couples on the street below even as she thrust her buttocks backwards.  She began to moan softly.

"I fancy you like mad, Helen".  said Lisa.  "I fancied you the moment I saw you walk in.  Ever been fucked by a women before?"

Helen felt delicate fingers working their way up the back of her legs, up her thighs, up her buttocks, taking the hem of her skirt with them.  She tried to speak but no sound would come from her lips.  She shook her head.

"Would you like me to fuck you?" said Lisa. 

Helen felt her tights and knickers being peeled back, over her buttocks, down her thighs.  She was panting now.  "Yes," she whimpered.  "Yes.  Fuck me.  Fuck me Lisa."   Lisa's probing fingers found Helen's cunt lips, circled round the hot flesh, slid into the crack, effortlessly slipping, finding Helen's clitoris, rubbing gently, oh so gently.  Helen jerked as the spasm rocked through her.  She started to cry out but Lisa's hand stifled her moans.

"Shhh!" said Lisa.  "Turn round."

Helen raised herself and turned.  Lisa's deep blue eyes looked straight into her mind.  She leaned forward, puckering her lips as she offered them to Lisa's waiting mouth, the scarlet lips parted ready to accept them.  They met softly, wetly, Helen's tongue pushing into Lisa's sweet mouth, wrestling with Lisa's sweet tongue.  Lisa's hands slipped the spaghetti straps from Helen's shoulders, peeling the slippery satin down to Helen's waist.  Helen worked her way down the buttons of Lisa's blouse, until the white silk parted to reveal Lisa's breasts, firm like two apples with velvety flesh which Helen's fingers stroked, teasing the hard plum-coloured nipples that stood proud.

Helen felt the clasp of her bra parting behind her back, allowing her own big, heavy breasts to tumble free.  She felt Lisa's mouth break away from the kiss and start to move down Helen's body, planting kisses on her throat, her bear shoulders,  Lisa lifted Helen's right breast and traced circles around the wide brown areolae with her tongue, spiraling slowly inwards towards the nipple, taking the nipple between her lips, into her mouth, suckling as Natalie had so many years before, making Helen moan in ecstasy, making her push her fingers through Lisa's soft hair, pulling Lisa's head into her body, digging her fingers in as the first ripples of delight shuddered through her.

And Lisa's lips left Helen's breast, replaced by the touch Lisa's fingers as Lisa's lips moved ever downwards, pausing to probe and explore Helen's navel, down and down into the wiry bush of hair that surrounded Helen's cunt lips.  And then Lisa's lips were sucking on Helen's fat luscious lips, dripping with cunt juice, and Lisa's tongue was pushing its way deep into Helen's sopping wet cunt so that Helen gasped and panted and whimpered "fuck me Lisa, fuck me fuck me fuck fuck yes, FUCK ME!".  Lisa took her tongue from Helen's cunt and teased and flickered Helen's clit with it, and Helen pushed two fingers into Helen's wet, slippery cunt hole, and then a third and then a fourth, and slid the fingers back and forth, back and forth while Helen thrust with her hips again and again against Lisa's face, against Lisa's thrusting fingers, the fingers that were fucking her so precisely, so expertly, so completely unlike the way David had ever fucked her, and Helen moand and Helen whimpered, and as the first wave of her orgasm broke Helen cried out, "oh, Oh, OOOOOOH!" and then the tide was in full spate and wave after wave washed over her and she jerked and cried out, "Fuck, fuck, yes fuck me YEEEEEEESSSSSSSS!" until she felt she was going to die and she wanted it to stop and she wanted it to go on for ever and ever.

* * *

Afterwards, Helen and Lisa lay together on an old mattress on the turret room floor, their arms locked around each other.  It was dark, except for the orange glow of the streetlights.  It was quiet outside, except for the distant shouts of some lads making their drunken way home from the pub.  Helen had no idea what time it was.  Her watch was the only thing she was wearing now.  Her burgundy dress was in a heap on the floor somewhere, entangled with Lisa's navy suit and silk blouse. 

"I'd better go home," Helen said, in a whisper.

"Do you want to go home?" said Lisa.

The silence was complete, all-enveloping.  And Helen knew that, wherever she went from here, she wouldn't go home.  Not ever.  And it didn't need words.

"Then fuck me again," said Lisa.
« Last Edit: Oct 11, 2013, 09:39:40 AM by enitharmon »

Offline MzB

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Re: The Vault Porn Writers' Guild
« Reply #377 on: Oct 11, 2013, 01:18:16 AM »
That is really very accomplished, enitharmon! I really like the clever arc and the little hints you give (but not too many) about Helen in part 1.

There is a very big repeat in part 2 which you need to cut out, and some tiny edits which I'm sure will be obvious if you read it again.

I think you could be a bit more exact in the actual sex scene if you wanted to be, and perhaps add in another one or two details of the act itself - it has enough momentum to allow a little more deviation if you know what I mean.

Also, if you wanted, I think you could tease the reader with a tiny exchange, or a little bit of history, between the two women in part 1.

But really, it's very good. Definitely publishable I would say, in the right place.

Thank you! More to follow? Hope so.

Oh and sorry, I've just realised that you didn't ask for feedback! I hope it's ok to give it.

And in answer to the thing you did ask, I enjoyed it very much.

Offline enitharmon

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Re: The Vault Porn Writers' Guild
« Reply #378 on: Oct 11, 2013, 09:45:51 AM »
Thanks, MzB!  I enjoyed writing it once I got going and I'm sure there will be more  8)

I've removed the repeat, that was simply me having trouble posting, with the word limit on posts.  I might leave it for a day or two now (maybe working on another story?) and then have another look, revise it, embellish it I'd really like to bring in more of the senses, tates, smell etc.  Perhaps eventually there's a longer piece there.

I don't mind feedback, really I don't, and even if I didn't specifically ask for it I'd welcome more of it!

Meanwhile, let's see what inspiration the weekend brings.

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Re: The Vault Porn Writers' Guild
« Reply #379 on: Oct 13, 2013, 10:36:38 PM »
Good stuff, enitharmon.  8)

Offline Blythe

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Re: The Vault Porn Writers' Guild
« Reply #380 on: Oct 13, 2013, 11:07:21 PM »
Ten out of ten !!
Fabulous !!
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Offline enitharmon

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Re: The Vault Porn Writers' Guild
« Reply #381 on: Oct 14, 2013, 03:41:13 PM »
Thanks for the feedback!  I feel distinctly encouraged, so watch this space.  Only problem might be finding the time suddenly I'm in a relationship and bouncing around like a teenager, I'm sure you know how it is ;) :D ;D

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Re: The Vault Porn Writers' Guild
« Reply #382 on: Oct 14, 2013, 07:16:21 PM »
Well done. Writing porn is famously good at bringing on relationships, you know  ;D


But then you have to stop for a while, because the relationship keeps you busy in that department.

Offline MzB

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Re: The Vault Porn Writers' Guild
« Reply #383 on: Oct 14, 2013, 07:44:56 PM »
Or inspires you!

Offline Lobo

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Re: The Vault Porn Writers' Guild
« Reply #384 on: Nov 22, 2013, 07:43:53 PM »
(*0*)....... (*w*)...... thats some good stuff you written right there enitharmon. Two smily faces :) :)
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Offline AnneA

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Re: The Vault Porn Writers' Guild
« Reply #385 on: Dec 27, 2013, 04:31:57 AM »
She placed my coffee on the table, from behind my sunglasses she couldn't see me stare blatantly. My heart always skips a beat but she would not see that either. Thank God.

Her black v neck shirt exposing her slender neck and collar bone as she leaned down, drawing my eyes lower still to the tattoo across the top of her chest. I could only see three letters HOP, their graceful scrawl..enticing. I wanted to trace the letters with my fingertips. My hand twitching slightly as though was going to reach out of its own accord.

She smiled briefly and walked away back toward the bar. Why oh why can't I get this girl out of my head? I closed my eyes behind the safety of my sunglasses and breathed deeply. I sipped my coffee, strong and hot, neglecting the pages of my book blowing in the breeze. I watched my waitress, serving behind the bar. Laughing easily with the patrons, her body moving fluidly. Every stretch, turn and slight movement intoxicating. I could see her muscles in her arm flex as she passed a drink to someone. Oh it has been way too long....She came back to collect my cup. "Can I get you anything else?" She asked her voice, low and gravelly.
I wanted to scream "Yes, yes you.
I watched as she subconsciously licked her lips to moisten them....
My own excitement making it difficult to say a word, eventually I mutter "No thanks"

What am I doing..... I grab my stuff and head to the bathroom. The cold water calms and allows me to gather myself. I promised it would stop, just having sex, hurting people. I promised myself I wouldn't do it to anyone else. Broken hearts are the worst.

My thoughts gathered, my resolved renewed. I went to leave. I had not noticed anyone come in. There was my waitress...her chocolate coloureds eyes staring straight into me....

"Do you think I don't see you watching me?" She asked
"I notice you every time you come in..your short hair, full lips and broad shoulders!"
I watched her face, watched her lips, heard her breathing....Devine.
She went to start to say something else...in two strides I had covered the distance between us placing my finger gently against her lips to quiet her. Her swallow deep.
I pushed her back against the bathroom door...pressing hard against her.
I crash into her mouth and swallow her small gasp, I my tongue chasing hers, her surprise is gone and raw need has us both. Our mouths smashing together, hands everywhere and no where all at once.
I pulled away to take a breath, we both needed it. I replaced the hard kisses with feather wisps nearly touching, licking her teeth and lips, each time she tried to kiss me hard I held her back.
My hand snaked up her black top, I grazed over her small breast, her hard nipple begging. I needed to see her.
I stood back enough to undress her. I lifted the shirt up and off letting my fingers drag against her skin along the way. I dropped it on the floor. Next I unbuttoned her pants and pulled them off, how delicious she had no underwear on and her short dark hair glistened. I slipped her pants off over shoes at the same time.  I stood holding her hands whiled I took in her naked body. she was fucking Devine. I ran my fingers across the words "Strength, Hope and Love" I kissed and licked her slowly devouring her as I made my way to to her nipple, squeezing it firmly in my teeth, my own desire unleashing. My hand slid down her belly across her damp hair and found her clit. Her head hit the back of the door and she cried out. I stopped briefly to undress and slipped straight back into her first one then two fingers, fucking her slowly then fast then slow, building. I straddled her leg and she moaned loudly looking at me, when she felt how wet I was she began to push against my hand, I moved myself back and forward in rhythm fucking her smooth thigh. We both came. Long deep and loud. We stood wet and sweaty against one another. I slowly slipped my fingers out. I stood back once more drinking in her body. I couldn't help myself I cleaned my fingers licking and sucking her juices off of them. My Devine waitress just watched mouth opened slightly.
It was time for us to get dressed once more.

"Are you going to say anything?" She enquired

I gave her a very gentle kiss and said

"I'll see you tomorrow"
"Is that it, no name no chat nothing?"

I moved close again and kissed her deep and hard

"Words are overrated"
With that I left knowing now she was truly my waitress. May just this once more I told myself
With every broken bone....I swear I lived.

Offline Blythe

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Re: The Vault Porn Writers' Guild
« Reply #386 on: Dec 27, 2013, 04:26:08 PM »
I bet that wasn't a Starbucks.


Well done, AA !!
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Offline AnneA

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Re: The Vault Porn Writers' Guild
« Reply #387 on: Dec 27, 2013, 11:03:32 PM »
I bet that wasn't a Starbucks.

Nope Not a Starbucks....There is a beautiful old beachside pub in Adelaide. Always good for coffee  ;D 
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Offline magical100

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Re: The Vault Porn Writers' Guild
« Reply #388 on: Jan 04, 2014, 07:43:32 PM »
Hope you left her a considerable tip ;)

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Re: The Vault Porn Writers' Guild
« Reply #389 on: Feb 05, 2015, 09:34:45 PM »
Vault porn has got its mojo back!